Rob Neyer Part Deux:

I feel the need to clarify one thing, since I left the idea of team representation wide open. The guidelines for assigning a player to a team were as follows:
1. The player must have spent the majority of his career on the team.
or
2. The player must have had his best seasons as a member of the team and played an extended period of time for said team (at least 5 years generally)

That said, this is why Joe Morgan does not qualify as an Astro, and why, as you'll see in a bit, the Devil Rays were nearly impossible to pick a rep for (Wade Boggs sadly does not count)

So without further ado here are the American League Alltime Allstars:

Starters:

C: Yogi Berra - New York Yankees
1B: Lou Gehrig - New York Yankees
2B: Eddie Collins - Chicago White Sox
3B: George Brett - Kansas City Royals
SS: Cal Ripken Jr. - Baltimore Orioles
OF: Babe Ruth - New York Yankees
OF: Ty Cobb - Detroit Tigers
OF: Ted Williams - Boston Red Sox
SP: Walter Johnson - Minnesota Twins (Washington Senators)

Reserves:

C: Ivan Rodriguez - Texas Rangers
1B: Jimmie Foxx - Oakland (Philadelphia) Athletics
1B: Frank Thomas - Chicago White Sox
2B: Charlie Gehringer - Detroit Tigers
2B: Roberto Alomar - Toronto Blue Jays
3B: Wade Boggs - Boston Red Sox
3B/OF: Aubrey Huff - Tampa Bay Devil Rays
SS: Alex Rodriguez - Seattle Mariners
OF: Rickey Henderson - Oakland Athletics
OF: Tris Speaker - Cleveland Indians
OF: "Shoeless" Joe Jackson - Cleveland Indians
OF: Mickey Mantle - New York Yankees
OF: Joe DiMaggio - New York Yankees
SP: Roger Clemens - Boston Red Sox
SP: Lefty Grove - Oakland (Philadelphia) Athletics
SP: Cy Young - Boston Red Sox
SP: Nolan Ryan - California Angels
SP: Pedro Martinez - Boston Red Sox
SP: Ed Walsh - Chicago White Sox
SP: Addie Joss - Cleveland Indians
SP: Jim Palmer - Baltimore Orioles
CL: Dennis Eckersley - Oakland Athletics
CL: Mariano Rivera - New York Yankees

Well, thats it. Now I just sit back and wait for ESPN/Fox Sports/MLB/etc. to contact me for my vast knowledge...or I finish my NMR homework...ugh

My Best Rob Neyer Impression:

May as well make it two days in a row, since I am sick of staring at NMR spectra for the evening. This is something I put together this summer during a weekend spent at the lab. Being the huge baseball fan and historian that I am, and given that it was around the all-star game, I decided a good way to kill the time would be to come up with all-time allstar teams for both the National and American Leagues. Groundrules are the same as current allstar teams: Roster size is 32 and every current franchise must be represented (Note that the franchise is what's important...thus Washington Senators (the 1st version) count as Minnesota Twins, Philadelphia Athletics as Oakland A's, etc. So here they are, my alltime allstar teams:

National League:

Starters:

C: Johnny Bench - Cincinnati Reds
1B: Mark McGwire - St. Louis Cardinals
2B: Rogers Hornsby - St. Louis Cardinals
3B: Mike Schmidt - Philadelphia Phillies
SS: Honus Wagner - Pittsburgh Pirates
OF: Willie Mays - San Francisco Giants
OF: Barry Bonds - San Francisco Giants
OF: Stan Musial - St. Louis Cardinals
SP: Christy Mathewson - San Francisco (New York) Giants

Reserves:
C: Mike Piazza - New York Mets
C: Gary Carter - Montreal Expos
1B: Todd Helton - Colorado Rockies
1B: Jeff Bagwell - Houston Astros
2B: Jackie Robinson - Los Angeles (Brooklyn) Dodgers
2B: Joe Morgan - Cincinnati Reds
3B: Mike Lowell - Florida Marlins
SS: Ernie Banks - Chicago Cubs
SS: Robin Yount - Milwaukee Brewers
OF: Hank Aaron - Atlanta (Milwaukee) Braves
OF: Frank Robinson - Cincinnati Reds
OF: Roberto Clemente - Pittsburgh Pirates
OF: Tony Gwynn - San Diego Padres
SP: Bob Gibson - St. Louis Cardinals
SP: Sandy Koufax - Los Angeles Dodgers
SP: Mordecai "Three-Finger" Brown - Chicago Cubs
SP: Grover Alexander - Philadelphia Phillies
SP: Steve Carlton - Philadelphia Phillies
SP: Tom Seaver - New Y0rk Mets
SP: Randy Johnson - Arizona Diamondbacks
SP: Warren Spahn - Atlanta (Milwaukee/Boston) Braves
SP: Greg Maddux - Atlanta Braves
CL: Bruce Sutter - Chicago Cubs

Wow that took way longer than I thought it would...I'll do the American League tomorrow

Back from Oblivion

You know, I would be spending my Sunday afternoon watching football, except this week the doubleheader game is on CBS which means I don't get it. (Yes I went through the trouble and expense of purchasing a 27 inch flat screen TV, but still remain too miserly to even get basic cable). Basically because my antenna is a piece of crap, I get three stations well: Fox, Pax, and MTV2 (dont ask). With quite a bit of effort and awkward positioning I can get CBS to the extent that I can hear the announcers and I see moving figures on the screen, although it often seems like I am watching three football games at once. So basically, theres only so much of that I can take until i get a headache, which is why, given no alternative, I've finally decided to return to the mecca of internet nerdiness: the blog.

Speaking of no alternatives: did anyone else watch the debate on thursday and immediately dread the next four years of American leadership? Now I'll be the first person to admit that I don't know all that much about politics and really don't give two shits about the whole system, but even I cringed when GW was speaking. What an idiot! How has America not gone up in flames the past 4 years? Did anyone else laugh out loud when he exclaimed and I quote: "Of course I know Osama bin Laden attacked us. I know that!"...Way to go George, we're all really impressed. Want a cookie or a medal? Perhaps 3 purple hearts?

And other than proving that John Kerry can hold his own in a public forum, what did the entire thing accomplish? Kerry clearly won the debate in my opinion, but what does that really indicate? I mean there were points in time where I thought Homer Simpson could have beaten Bush ("Extended warranty! How could I lose?!") . Did we actually learn anything? Well, here's what I learned:

1. Being president is "hard work" (Did anyone else think Bush sounded like the class idiot making excuses for bombing every exam? Of course its not easy, but there have been 41 other men who have done an adequate job or better...strap on a pair)

2. Kerry will ruin all of our relationships with world powers. Can you believe he forgot Poland when listing the nations that came to our aid at the beginning of the Iraq debacle?! Poland! What is this world coming to, when a possible Commander in Chief neglects a country as important as Poland? Really John, get with the program.

3. Debate moderators don't really wield any power over the candidates. Did you see how GW interrupted practically every Kerry rebuttal before being granted his 30 seconds extra. Weren't you just waiting for Jim Lehrer to tell him to shut the hell up? Or perhaps better yet scold him for speaking out of turn. I propose that Ray Lewis be the moderator at the next presidential debate to teach these punk politicians a lesson. Nobody would fuck with him.

Yeah thats about what I got from it. After a while it became awfully repetitive (I heard "Wrong war, wrong place, wrong time" so much I thought I was listening to a Fatboy Slim song), but I'm glad I watched and am looking forward to the next one...if only to see our brilliant leader once again stun us all with his dizzying intellect.

And as usual I will leave you with a Simpsons reference, this one naming two other world superpowers that Kerry can ruin our relations with.

From an advertisement for a soccer match:
"This match will decide once and for all which nation is the greatest on earth: Mexico or Portugal!"